


how to say "i love you" in vigilante

by queerbaitings



Category: DCU (Comics), Super Sons (Comics)
Genre: 5 + 1 Things, Dick is here once but doesn't speak, Dudes Being Bros, Gen, Getting Together, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, Love Confessions, M/M, Pre-Relationship, go tell ur bro u love him, they're so gross i love them
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-22 15:59:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17062700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queerbaitings/pseuds/queerbaitings
Summary: 5 times Jon tells Damian he loves him and one time Damian says it back.





	how to say "i love you" in vigilante

**Author's Note:**

> has this been done before? probably
> 
> this was originally something _very_ different, but that idea was too hard to write, so this was born!

The first time Jon says it, he's thirteen and it's not necessarily a confession of  _love_ so much as him telling Damian how much their friendship means to him.

So when Jon punches the lights out of some goon and turns to Damian with a soft, "I love you, dude," Damian doesn't think much of it - just gives a half-smile and turns back to the criminal he was beating the crap out of.

They continue their patrol the same as they normally would, regardless of the words Jon spoke that night. It didn't change anything. They were still best friends.

By the time Jon said it next, the first time was long forgotten.

* * *

The second time Jon said it, they were out on patrol, much like the first time. Jon was fourteen this time, and pummelling bad guys with Damian was second nature at this point. He has Damian's back, and Damian has his.

They had just finished tying up some criminals after a drug bust when Jon turned to Damian, face more serious than the eldest had seen in a long while - even when crime-fighting. It was a little unsettling, but Damian followed when Jon beckoned him with his hand. He still trusted Jon - that didn't change.

Jon stops at the edge of a rooftop, sitting down with his legs hanging over the side. Damian does the same, cringing when he sees that Jon's legs are longer than his own once again.

Neither of them say anything. It's just them and the night.

Until Jon  _does_ speak and Damian's wishing he hadn't. Because Jon's looking Damian right in the eyes and saying, " _I think I might be in love with you_ ," and Damian's trying hard not to laugh. But he does. He laughs  _hard_ in Jon's face, trying to avoid looking at the hurt expression on his friend's face.

"Are you joking?" he asks, and he prays it's true. Hopes Jon will start laughing too and tell him, " _yeah, just joking, dude_ ," like this was all some prank he decided would be the  _perfect_ way to fuck with Damian. Because it is - Damian hasn't felt as panicked as he does now in a long time.

But Jon  _doesn't_ tell him it's a joke. Doesn't laugh. Doesn't smile. Only shakes his head, smallest hint of tears pooling in his eyes. And Damian chokes. Damian's expression falls - because, isn't Jon supposed to be the poster  _good boy_? Jon isn't - he isn't supposed to _feel like this_. And for  _Damian?_ Oh god, Damian was going to vomit.

Abruptly rising to his feet, Damian scowled at the younger boy, grounding out a rough, " _don't be disgusting_ ," before turning away into the night. Damian was going to vomit. He was going to vomit or he was going to cry, he  _didn't know_. He just couldn't be there, because  _Robin can't show any signs of weakness, get out of there, Damian_.

Damian ran into the night, leaving his supposed  _best friend_ behind on that rooftop even though Clark and Lois will have his head for it. Damian keeps running, and -

\- Dick finds him, hours later, in his bedroom in the manor, still in costume. Dick doesn't say anything; just wraps his brother in a tight hug. Damian doesn't fight it, just sobs into his brother's chest because - because if  _Jon_ is disgusting then  _Damian_ is too because he's noticed how beautiful Jon looks in the right lighting (all lighting), and how his laugh makes Damian's chest feel tight and his face feel hot and he's  _screwed_ because how can he think homosexuals are disgusting if he  _is one_?

Dick rubs Damian's back softly, unsure of what's going on, but whispering his reassurances into his hair nonetheless.

* * *

The third time Jon says it, he's fifteen and Damian has apologised for the second time on more occasions than Jon can count and they're  _good_. Damian told Jon  _why_ he reacted like he did - that he'd believed since birth that he was supposed to  _produce an heir_ and he  _couldn't_ if he was was gay, which translated to  _gay = bad_ in his brain and carried through until recently. He told Jon he was  _working on it_ and that he's not going to freak and he's  _sorry_.

Jon forgave him pretty quickly, even if the reaction had  _stung_.

This time, they weren't on patrol; weren't in uniform. They were just  _Jon and Damian_ , not  _Superboy and Robin_ , and that's how Jon liked it. He liked sitting near  _Damian_ as he did something as mundane as he was doing at that moment; drawing. The older male was only half paying attention to Jon, and he could tell. But it was okay. He could keep talking if it meant he could watch as Damian's hand moved across paper with ease and he could see his friend's face scrunch up when he was having trouble with a particular angle and - 

\- Yeah, Jon's in love. And it feels  _so good_.

He smiles, leaning forward until his head was resting on Damian's outstretched leg and the fact that Damian doesn't even  _react_ is so  _good_ in its own way and Jon can't believe that  _this_ is his best friend.  _This_ is the person he loves.

"Hey, Dami," Jon starts, getting a noncommittal grunt in return. "I'm in love with you."

Damian drops his pencil, face burning a bright red that Jon  _loves_. Damian doesn't look mad this time and Jon's so grateful because he looks, dare he say,  _fond_? Damian smiles at his friend, something soft and barely-there that Jon's sure only he and  _maybe_ Damian's family could detect.

"I'm sorry, Jon," and that's  _okay_ because even though Damian's gay it doesn't mean he likes  _Jon_ and Jon accepted that fact after the second time. "I want to respond, but, it would be unfair to you if we were to...start something, and I was not all okay with what was happening." With that, Damian went back to drawing.

And Jon? He smiled, because that sounded like a  _not yet_ instead of a  _no_.

* * *

The fourth time, it was raining. Jon is sixteen and they're yelling in the rain in their costumes and he feels  _gross_ but he wants Damian to  _understand_. Wants him to  _know_ that he shouldn't have jumped in front of a bullet for Jon because - Jon's  _bulletproof_ , he can handle being shot at!

But Damian's not listening. Yelling something about how it was  _instinct_ and he couldn't handle Jon being hurt and - Jon couldn't listen. Because Damian may have been trained by the League of Assassins, but he's  _not bulletproof_ and he  _could have died_ and, oh god, Jon's crying now, and yelling back and his throat is  _raw_.

Jon doesn't want to yell. He just wants to pull Damian close and make sure he's alright because, oh god, he was  _shot at, is he okay_?

So Jon reaches forward and pulls Damian into his chest, holding him tight and listening to his heartbeat through the rain. Damian is tense when Jon pulls back to look him in the eye.

"Damian, I'm  _bulletproof_." Damian looks away, embarrassment flushing his face. " _You_ aren't. I love you, Damian, and if anything happened to you because you tried to protect me, I wouldn't be able to live with myself."

That's when Damian looks back up at him, and Jon sees the flush on his face has deepened.

"I'm sorry, Jonathan. I can't make promises, but I'll...try not to let it happen again." Well. Jon'll take what he can get. For now.

Jon's moving to release Damian from his hold when - when did Damian get so close? And then there are lips on his, soft and brief and Jon's brain is  _broken_ and his face is _red_ because - Damian just  _kissed him_ , and he's pulling back before Jon gets a chance to respond. So he reaches a hand to Damian's cheek and chases his lips, pressing firmer and more assured than Damian had and Damian  _reciprocates_ and they're  _kissing in the rain_ like total cliches and Jon couldn't be happier.

When they pull away, Jon's grinning and flushed and Damian's smile  _rivals Jon's_ and he couldn't be happier.

"Does this mean I can finally take you on a date?" Jon's tone is joking, but he's never been more serious.

Damian laughs as he nods.

* * *

The fifth time, Damian is flush underneath Jon and Jon's not sure if he's seen anything more beautiful than Damian in the soft morning light, hair splayed against his pillow as Jon leans over him and kisses him like his life depends on it.

Jon is seventeen and he can't believe that this is his life.

Hickies adorned Damian's neck in a pattern that Jon was proud to have marked, his arms around his  _boyfriend_ 's neck as he moaned for  _deeper_ and Jon is all too happy to give. Jon's never been more in love with Damian than he is in the early mornings, whether it's when they accidentally crash together after a long night of patrol, or when Jon wakes up next to his partner when he  _planned_ to stay over. Right now was the latter, and soft good morning kisses had  _escalated_  and Jon wondered how he had ever kept his hands off Damian before.

Jon buries his face in Damian's shoulder as he thrusts, kissing against the older's neck and whispering soft praises that had Damian pulling him up to capture his lips in a kiss.

And Jon's so in love with the man beneath him - has been since he was  _fourteen_ , which is weird for him to think about. He loves Damian more and more each day and the fact that he can call Damian  _his_ and kiss his when patrol gets slow and hold him in his arms when they sit next to each other on the couch feels like a surreal dream.

Jon's pulling away from the kiss ever so slightly so he can murmur, "I love you," into Damian's lips before swallowing up whatever response Damian would give. As much as he'd love to hear Damian say it back, hearing it for the first time in the middle of sex is  _not_ the way to go. Damian doesn't seem to mind the distraction, so Jon doesn't bother feeling bad.

* * *

When Damian says it back, he's sitting on his bed, leaning back on the headboard with a book in his hand. Jon's eighteen and has just moved in with his boyfriend, relaxing before he finishes unpacking the limited belongings he brought with him. Damian's petting his hair with the hand not holding the book and Jon's about to drift off for a nap when he hears a soft, "Jonathan?"

So Jon sits upright next to Damian, giving his boyfriend his full attention.

Damian smiles, so Jon does too.

"I'm glad you decided to move in with me. I know it can't have been an easy decision." Jon nods, even though it was. He can still easily see his parents, and it wasn't like education was a big reason for him to stay in Metropolis or move elsewhere. "I know I haven't been the easiest to deal with...especially when you were fourteen."

Jon cringes. They haven't spoken of the  _second time_ since Jon was almost sixteen. He'd forgiven Damian and moved on. But he still listened. Damian always  _could_ easily captivate Jon.

"I wanted you to know...I love you. It - it must have been hard not hearing me say it. Just...know that I do, and I'm glad that I can now say it without wanting to run away." Damian finishes with a smile that's quickly wiped off his face when Jon kisses him.

"I love you so much, Damian," Jon breathes against his lips, laughing. There are small tears falling down his cheeks as he speaks - happy tears. "I knew. I knew it here," he grabbed Damian's hand, placing it on his heart, "that you love me. But thank you  _so much_ for telling me." With that, he kisses Damian again.


End file.
